So, I felt the Lord calling me to missions again this summer. Not just any mission trip to anywhere, but a mission to Africa. I must tell you, I have always been afraid of going to Africa. I’d been afraid that it would be dangerous, afraid of disease, afraid that I wouldn’t be able to connect to the people there. But, the Lord has been softening my heart and changing it. I also realized how closed off I had had been on the previous missions trips I’d been on. I had been afraid of reaching out and actually physically loving on the kids I had been around because I was afraid of getting dirty. I know that sounds horrible, but I let my selfish desire to not get dirty interfere with the opportunity to reach out to the kids I was supposed to be ministering to. I was so wrapped up in going to a cool new place, that I distanced myself from the real reason for being there. I got distracted and I threw away a lot of opportunities. I made it about me, and it makes me really sad to think about now. I’m not saying I didn’t learn things and grow while on those trips, but it could have been a lot different.
So, fast-forward to this summer. The Lord convicted me about the selfishness I’ve held in my heart concerning missions and that began to reach even further into the selfishness I’ve held in life with my friends. It’s so easy for me to hide behind laughter and small talk and not ask people what their life story is and what’s up in their lives. I chicken out on the real-life conversations and keep my distance because it’s safer and I have less of a chance of getting hurt. SO, in the midst of Him revealing this to me, He tells me that I need to go on a mission. To Africa. And work with orphans. To get down on the floor and LOVE on them. I was pretty surprised. Then, last week, I was talking to my boss whose daughter went to Africa this summer on a mission to a town devoted to orphans. It’s called Bulembu. He told me that they may have a trip happening this December and asked if I would be interested in going. OF COURSE! I told him that I would be very interested. I couldn’t believe that the Lord was opening a door to Africa before next summer, but I felt the need to say yes and not hesitate. I am very excited and can’t wait to see how He works it out. I am praying for the Lord to continue to melt my heart for the kids there and incinerate the selfish desires in my heart to close myself off from others. Please be praying that He moves a mountain in my heart that I could not expect!